ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize