It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
