high people should be assigned attendants
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Randomize
