i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
