Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
