WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Randomize
