You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
