so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize