I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize