Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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