Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
