i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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