Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize