so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Randomize
