): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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