I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Randomize
