It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
