I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
