farters have to be the big spoon...
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
