so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
