It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
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