I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize