I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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