You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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