This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
