Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Ketchup is God's man juice
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
