He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
