Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
