You just made me feel so damn special
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
