shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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