Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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