my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
