We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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