You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
