Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
