I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
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