the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
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