Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
farters have to be the big spoon...
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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