Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
