I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
We have started to decorate penises.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
