so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Randomize
