Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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