I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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