Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
