The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
