Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
