porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Randomize
