just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
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