I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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