You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
